WADE In… A dream to get LOST IN. How about having a meal together. 50 years ago my brother was born on this day. He was looking forward to celebrating today but did not make it. The past 3 ½ months his memory rests heavy inside the heart of each of us. To honor his memory we need to get to the ocean because that is where he really liked to go and because we have grown accustomed to going there to celebrate the day with him. He was an excellent swimmer, often swam in the ocean beyond the waves, and at a younger time taught young people to swim and was a lifeguard. In Los Angeles for 90% of his short life his birthday was on an extremely warm day so we all gravitated to the ocean to celebrate there with him.
Last year during the pandemic he wanted to take a drive to Point Dume. The year before we spent the afternoon at a beautiful beach location in Santa Monica next to the historic Annenberg Community Beach House. There he could go close to the water in his wheelchair. We’ll bake a yellow cake with chocolate icing because that is what he wanted made for him last year. Also, we’ll eat homemade manicotti and not forget the sparkling cider. When its time to sing happy birthday we’ll put on all 50 candles plus 1 and then all of us will blow them out together each imagining what his wish would be. Today will be his last official birthday. Like most he liked getting a present. Already passing half a life with challenges and pacing forward with hope for the second half of his life to be more fulfilling, today required a special present. On his 40th we gave him a beautiful hand drawn and inked picture perfectly framed of 3 Geisha women in a bamboo fenced Japanese garden playing a board game with small button-like pieces called stones. They are playing the ancient game called Go. The picture seemed made for him and was even more special because we came upon it in a nearby yard sale. It was beautiful and valuable. It seemed placed there for us to find and put on his wall to enjoy. The continent of Asia excited him. He wanted to return to Japan. This year there would have been a ticket to a special setting. The song I wrote, A Dream To Get Lost In, was written before he passed away with no forewarning, but there are unexpected messages that I wrote unknowingly in it about him and later realized. Some things we know in advance without knowing. He really liked very soft dune sand and kept some in his bedroom as we do, too. He held close to him thought through dreams and enjoyed the pleasure of small things. I have felt the loneliness of an empty box sung about in this song on more than a few occasions, but no other occasion seems like now.
Dreams and memories add color to a life. I wanted to write a song about tiny boxes because I like to finger and touch small things and I like putting some of those things in tiny boxes to sponsor memories. The music I wrote for the melody and composed originally on guitar describes musically how I feel about dreams nourished by memories. I finished the lyrics on March 1. My mom wanted him to listen to the song when I finished the music. Somehow that didn’t happen. I recorded the song last month, 2 months after he passed away. Listen to the song a few times. I think each time you listen you will find something for yourself that seems personal. I wrote A Dream.. in G major.
I do know we will continue remembering his day, never forgetting it all our days.
It is good that the pandemic is more under control but too many are not thinking clearly. Getting vaccinated and how that small and easy act can benefit everyone seems lost on too many. Too many have died: 612,000+ have already died from Covid-19 in the USA. 4,200,000 have died from Covid-19 in the entire world. Too many are still getting sick. From current readings those figures are likely grossly understated. I know…we all know people who have died from Covid. Their loss is a loss that can’t be forgotten or minimized. Still one half the people in the USA are not fully vaccinated or object to getting vaccinated. Some children won’t grow old or will grow old without a parent or without both parents or without a grandparent or without grandparents or a close relative who didn’t survive the pandemic. No one should have to prematurely look into that empty box I wrote into A Dream To Get Lost In.
The chorus of A Dream To Get Lost In:
1 ½ inches by 1 ½ inches
A little less or more,
Full or part empty,
One contains a folded note,
Another a smooth rock picked up
Off a riverbed floor,
The orange box
Has a small key to another box.
There is one with soft sand
Filled to the brim
To put my finger deep in,
And one box empty
To remind what that feels like.
Each after open
Is like a dream
To get lost in.
The chorus visualizes a totally real scene. While I was composing the music especially for the chorus, its sound developed magically like it was being wound out of a music box. Music boxes are wonderful because they can be wound and listened to as we slip off to sleep. In my imagination he is listening as he falls asleep.
Thank you always for your loyalty and support demonstrated by your returning to listen to my music and voice!
Now please put on earphones and listen to A Dream To Get Lost In. Earphones make listening enjoyable because you will not miss a word, and you will hear all the layering of the piano.
Friday July 30, 2021
When someone dies, being alive without them prods us to increase the purpose for our living. jek